October and Me

I received my last installment of vegetables from my shared CSA with Calliope farm yesterday. It made me think about how glad I am that so many people I know have chosen to become farmers over the years. Also, it made me grateful that Olympia has so many resources at its fingertips. It is a great place, we are lucky. As I ate my candle lit dinner of pesto pasta and braised kale last night (alone..tear), I thought about how in the future we are going to have to be doing a lot more together.

Honestly, I have always been slightly adverse to communal idealism finding its way into my core beliefs. I used to be a Hippy of sorts when I was younger, and the whole experince sent me reeling for years down a path much more staunch and what I saw as realistic. In many respects I'm still there. But lately with my increasingly doomy attitude about the future, I am turning back ideologically towards a future where closer cooperation seems neccisary and fundamental for alternative communities to survive.

Only time will tell, I am mostly just plugging away, trying to make the most sense out of what little we have to hold onto. The assinine politics of the presidential race coupled with the economic disaster has driven me to sincerly asses where I am, where I want to go and what is even going to be an option in the future.

October is halfway done, The full moon was amazing. I love Olympia and every thing is peechy. My new mottos.

our days are numbered, and amazing.

Lately it has been hitting me how finite, insecure and temporal our lifestyle really is. I mean generally I don't get all doom and gloom, that I hate everything sort of way. But, really we are just into the shit of things so deep that there is no conceivable way to ignore it anymore. We or at least I don't want to let these feelings destroy my life however.

In the midst of all this great tragedy and hardship there is such brilliant beauty. We do hold a power and ability to love beyond or means that makes me shiver.

Enough of that. I have had some hard decisions to make recently and I am really stressed out about a friendship of mine that I am really worried about fucking up. And doing the "right thing" is so hard, but the results are usually incredible.

Life is weird, full of unintended inferences and misconstrued feelings, at least mine is. I would be happy living near the beach walking a dog or two and just wondering the days away.

herzog and sofas

what a beautiful amazingly normal and bizarre day. nothing to eventful just a smattering of living and working in our great and insular environment.

i saw the beautiful new film by werner herzog Encounters at the End of the Earth. shot entirely in Antarctica as well as some archival footage use. as with most herzog films i was blown away by the beauty and deep emotional connection that herzog forges with his subject matter. since Encounters is essentially about the raw natural earth i.e. ice, magma, wildlife and the dreams and aspirations of the scientist and support communities at the research facility, the film takes on a kind of worshipful tone. an almost ethereal element permeates the extended underwater shots.

i am blown away that herzog in spite of again and again using his voiceover and narration during his films, manages to maintain insightful and frankly genius views of his candid subjects. i basically am enthralled with his work and can just never get enough every time i see another one.

thank you werner.

also i think that the age old courtesy of helping someone move something if you are able to provide that service is awesome, even though it gets really old sometimes and i have moved so many peoples shit over the years, today i moved a sofa for someone and it really did warm my heart to be able to help, for whatever reason.

rain

It has been raining now for days. I was really excited to come back from Montana this last weekend and still have a few weeks of summer. However, it feels like all the fun and sunshine is gone and I really have been feeling the effect of Seasonal Affective Disorder today. I just felt pissed and uncomfortable.

I have been reading a lot about the U.S/Russia strife. That probably has a lot to do as well with the shitty feelings.

Some thing that is wonderful though, is wood. I am helping make this small Douglas Fir box for the Film Ranch, and I just love to work with beautiful old wood. I took a 1x6 and planed it down to about 1/2 inch and sanded it really nice. It is one of the things that keeps me going at work is that we really do save some amazing gorgeous wood.

Good night.

the start of something

Hi,

It has been a while since I had a blog thought this might be fun to try out again. The last one i had i never updated after a while and just got really boring.

In the last few months my life has moved in new directions that are really exciting and also just really foreign and unusual for me. I had a pretty major breakup that changed things big for me, I did a little casual dating for a while, I got a really big and intense promotion at my work and i have been feeling like i just have to keep things rolling in a positive direction.

I live in Olympia, WA, I love it here it is really small, if you live here for more than a month you end up knowing half the town and there is a great music scene (in my opinion at least). Sometimes though things get a little tough around here. Mostly for me it is about being in a near state of having and identity crisis. You see I am trying to grow up (just a little) but also not lose my ethics and my personality and my love for fun and weird times.

With my new job I have to spend a lot more time alone and away from my friends at work, this has been the hardest thing to adjust to. Letting friendships slip through the cracks. This and also going from just being a co-worker to being a boss. I am trying to balance this the best I can, be a good person, but also keep the business from sinking into oblivion.

I guess that is a pretty good start. Stay tuned.